Monday, March 19, 2012

The First In a Saga of Stalking

I know that I'm not perfect by any means. I have had my share of drama that was my fault, but I can't figure out why I feel bad about this drama. As far as I know, my actions have been justified, but at the same time, I feel like they haven't.

About a month ago, I got into an argument with what used to be one of my friends. There was a lot of drama that was leading up to it so it was no surprise when it finally exploded and I gave up.
I had arranged a fundraiser for an after school activity that I help with but it seemed like nobody was showing up. Disappointed in my friends, stressed, and embarrassed, I turned to the person that I had been spending the most time with.
I called the girl, who will be know as Jay, and asked her to come help me. Her girlfriend, also a friend of mine, quickly agreed but Jay said no and talked her out of it. She said that her mom told her that she couldn't leave the house. Well, I knew that even if it was true, it didn't matter. Jay never listened to her mom and left when she wanted to, she just didn't want to help. I pleaded with her but she just cursed me out so I hung up on her.
She was mad at me for having blocked her number the night before and that's why she didn't come. I had blocked her number because she was constantly calling me with her mood swings, cursing me out because I couldn't arrange a ride to go get her girlfriend that lives two hours away, and then calling me to remind me that she loves me. I was getting over fifty calls a hour at times.

This, along with all the other drama that happened before, and trust me, there was a lot, was what broke it for me.
I told her that I didn't want anything to do with her and for her to leave me alone. She must have thought like usual that I would get over it and move on.
I didn't.

Once I didn't approach her, I believe that she started to follow me around to remind me that she was there in hopes that I would make amends. When she tried to talk to me, I would ignore her and talk to my friends or walk away.
It didn't take long until this game became obsessive, her following me around the school everywhere I went.
She had been known to follow people before, having followed my parents around once when they were at the school. She tried to follow me onto the stage when I was getting awarded and she's been known to jump in the car with my friends and me when she wasn't welcomed.
So this wasn't too big of a surprise. She began to sit at the table that I eat lunch at with my friends and they soon became annoyed of her.
(Actually, to correct that, they were already annoyed with her before we even got in a fight. One of the such dramas we had was her accusing me of running her over when she was nowhere near the car and at that moment, they had lost all hope in her being anybody that they'd want around. It also doesn't help that she is loud and talks about sex all of the time.)
They began to ask her to leave but for the most part, ignored her.

Everyone knows that I'm one of the biggest Pokemon nerds in the school and that I collect Pokemon cards. So once she began to talk about them and reference a person, saying things such as, "I burned some Pokemon cards yesterday because I couldn't burn certain people" everyone knew that she was talking about me. It might have helped her be a little more discreet if she wasn't looking straight at me while saying it to.
That was it.
I wasn't going to sit at the table and listen to someone talk about me all day. It went from Pokemon cards to crude sexual jokes and insults.
Eventually I lost my temper, put both of my hands on the table, looked at my friends, and asked out loud, "Why is the annoying slut at the table still?"
I'm not proud of losing my temper, but I realized that it was getting away with me and got up to go get the principal and let him know what was going on.
Of course she told him that I called her a slut and when he asked me about it, I made no hesitation to admit to it. Petty insults and lies aren't going to get me in college, owning up to my mistakes and being an adult about them will help though.
It didn't look good on me, there being straight evidence that I was the issue and I realized this as soon as he asked me.
He told me that I couldn't sit at the table with my friends anymore, thinking that I was the start of the drama.
I told my friends and my mom who were outraged by this decision. It took a little time before they realized why I was moved and she wasn't.
I asked my friends to explain the situation to my mom on the phone and then asked her to go talk the principal the next day.

My mom was not happy.
She had seen the drama with Jay before and experienced it first hand when we almost had to call the police because Jay's mom was threatening to come to our house and kick some ass.
She marched into the office with me behind her, begging her to keep her temper in check. Amazingly, she didn't curse out the principal but I could see she was on the brink any second. The principal came to his senses and promised that he would do something about it that day.
However, we didn't know that she wasn't there that day.
It was a Friday, the weekend passed, and Monday came.


Monday, today, it started at breakfast.
I was on the other side of the cafeteria from her and got up to go talk to my friend, Bre. Jay also got up, and followed me over to Bre. Then I went to another friend to tell her good morning, Jay followed me to that friend. Finally I gave in and headed to class, Jay followed me to class until the teacher stopped her.
Lunch came and she sat at my table again. The principal had told me while with my mom that if she did to get security and explain the situation so I did. Security moved her, she made a scene, it was over for the moment.
I decided to go talk to the principal and let him know just in case and when I got up, almost fifteen of my friends got up with me and tried to follow me to the office. As we walked to the office, I believe that more joined in, having seen her follow me around the school incessantly and talk about me openly. Security stopped us at the door though and made me pick four of my best friends from the group.
Once I got to the office, she was already there with a mutual friend of ours.
The principal sent everyone but her and me away and sat us down to talk to us. The conversation was pretty much the same thing the entire time through.
I made my three points, I wanted her to stop harassing me, my friends, and my family.
Over the weekend, she had been texting harassing messages to my sister-in-law and I brought this up.
The principal agreed that was pretty cut and dry and insisted that we were adults who could work this out from now on and just leave each other alone.
She kept being disrespectful and the conversation finally ended when she was excused to go puke because she's pregnant.

After this, I went to class and the teacher gave me permission to go to the art room and work on a project. The art room is right next to the cafeteria so when I couldn't find the art teacher, I went to talk to my friends at lunch.
She was sitting next to the security guard and made the comment, "Look who's stalking who" when I walked by. Trying to find the art teacher or figure out what to do, I had to walk by her several times. One of the times she laughed really loud and one of my friends looked at her darkly. Apparently she was back to talking about me, but I ignored it.
Finally security told me to go back to class and accused me of skipping.
So to avoid getting in trouble, I went back to class.

I found it funny that she could skip every day in front of security and follow me around like a lost puppy, but when I have permission to be out, security gets smart with me...
Must be because she's pregnant.

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